What is Discernment Counselling?

Discernment counselling is where couples who are uncertain whether they want to continue their relationship can see a psychologist that will help them clarify their thoughts about whether they want the relationship to continue or to end the relationship. This is a very gentle and respectful treatment that we offer at Better Health Psychology in order to help couples consider all options before they make their decision. It is useful for current relationships, as part of marriage counselling and also for singles that want to understand what happened in a previous relationship. It is not about blaming anyone and respecting both people is an important part of this process.

Discernment counselling can be offered as part of couples therapy, or to one person from a couple who is unsure whether to stay in the relationship. In some cases, one or both people in the relationship are relieved that they found the clarity to end the relationship. In other cases, we find that there was a reason for the couple’s difficulties that can be treated and this means that the couple will now feel happy and fully confident about continuing their relationship together long-term. Living with ambivalence and stress every day causes more harm to a couple, or family, than making a decision to end the relationship (and learning to live apart and be happy). On the other hand, you could be stressed and uncertain about the relationship for years, only to start Discernment Counselling and find the answers you needed to finally be fully committed to staying together. Discernment counselling makes sense of it so that you can feel confident in your relationship decision.